On our Raising Accountable Kids Facebook page, we posted the image attached:
If you want your child to become an adult, ask this:
Have I made excuses for his/her behavior recently?
If so, STOP NOW.
It did well, with many Shares and Likes. Yet, one visitor to our page objected with this remark: “Or we could just let them be children!”
We have no idea what he was trying to say. We agree that kids should be kids. However, as they get older, a parent’s responsibility is to support their emotional growth, prepare them for life, and help them reach their full potential.
To be adults in an adult world.
Right?
However, we do not do this when we blame external conditions and other people for our children’s actions, regardless of their age.
That said, we suggest avoiding these ten excuses for rationalizing a child’s behavior. When we use these excuses, we are certainly not helping them grow.
10 Parenting Excuses to Quit Using Today
1. My child is “spirited” & “strong-willed.”
2. She picked up that bad habit at daycare.
3. Society doesn’t support our values.
4. The schools don’t do their job.
5. His friends are a bad influence.
6. Celebrities set a lousy example.
7. My spouse doesn’t help enough.
8. Social media is the problem.
9. It’s just a phase; all kids do it.
10. If I discipline them, they’ll think I’m mean.
Warning: Our list will not resonate with any mom or dad who doesn’t accept the premise (stated on page 2 of the “RAK” book) that children are … a product of our parenting.
We can reject this principle, but what are we left with?
Blame. Rationalization. Excuse-making. And dare we say, enabling.
Even when outside influences are present, a parent must fully accept personal accountability for a child’s development. Otherwise, the child will struggle to grow.
Mom and Dad won’t grow either.
So, if you’re willing to accept that these ten parental excuses are just that—excuses—which ones will you stop using? If you have ever used them, that is. 😉
Feel free to comment below. We’d love to hear your thoughts.
Grab your copy of Raising Accountable Kids (and one for a friend) here!
