School is back in session—new teachers, new routines, new challenges. But let’s be honest: the toughest classroom isn’t at school—it’s at home.

What do I mean by “tough”? I mean, didn’t we want to become parents? Didn’t we choose this? Erik and I definitely did. In fact, we spent years praying to start our family and faced challenges along the way, but that’s a story for another time. 

What Makes Accountable Parenting Hard?

What makes parenting hard? It’s the daily consistency needed to model the right path. To “show up” every day, hour, and minute to nurture character in these little “minis” of us. 

Is it exciting? Yes! Is it exhausting? Yes! Is it an incredible honor? Yes! Because it carries such a significant responsibility, we must recognize the challenges and rise to meet them with practical tools … like QBQ! 

Accountable Parenting with the QBQ!

As parents, it’s tempting to fall into the trap of asking Incorrect Questions (IQs) (tutorial here) like:

• “Why won’t my kids listen?”
• “When will they finally take responsibility?”
• “Who’s going to make life easier for me?”

Those questions go nowhere. Progress comes when we ask The Question Behind the Question (QBQ) instead:

• “What can I do to model accountability?”
• “How can I respond with patience in this moment?”
• “What step can I take to help my child grow?”

In our house, the switch from 100 days of summer vacation to back-to-school is a dose of harsh reality. Our ten-year-old, Andrew, just this morning said, “Well, I’m like, sad, but also, kinda happy.” Yep, Buddy, that’s precisely how we feel, too! 

On Facebook, “Grandpa Miller”—AKA The QBQ! Guy—asked, “Is September more of an ending or a beginning for you?” Responses varied, but either way, we know the back-to-school season provides a chance to “reset” and begin a new rhythm. As parents, we are responsible for establishing a healthy rhythm. 

Takeaways for Parents

Today, I can ask, 

• “What can I do to evaluate our fall schedule for margin?”
• “How can I respond with patience in the post-school-day chaos?”
• “What can I do to communicate my expectations and follow through?”

These questions remind me that I can take responsibility for what I can control—myself. Going back to school is full of energy and can be both exciting and challenging. Let’s use the QBQ! to reflect by asking, “How can I model personal accountability?” 

Truth: Personal accountability is the most important back-to-school supply.

So, parents, keep going, stay strong, and enjoy the back-to-school season!

P.S. The latest QBQ! Podcast episode features Erik and me sharing real stories from the “parenting trenches.” From funny kid comebacks to the daily challenge of practicing what we preach, we are reminded that personal accountability isn’t just for the workplace—it’s for the dinner table, the minivan, and the late-night homework battles.