Victim Thinking Serves Nobody!


Ever made statements like these?

  • My kids don’t listen to me. It’s not fair. (Read: Parenting the QBQ Way)
  • The bank sold us a mortgage we couldn’t afford. It’s not fair.
  • I didn’t get the promotion/raise I expected. It’s not fair.
  • Others don’t work as hard as I do. It’s not fair.
  • My boss doesn’t communicate very well. It’s not fair.
  • They cut our benefits. It’s not fair.
  • My staff isn’t motivated. It’s not fair.
  • My co-workers are difficult. It’s not fair.
  • We can’t find people who want to work. It’s not fair.
  • I’m buried in student loans. It’s not fair.
  • The neighbors have a new boat/car/pool. It’s not fair.
  • The referees were awful and we lost the game. It’s not fair.

The truth is, no one is promised “fairness.” Humans make hurtful comments, accidents occur, events take a turn we don’t expect, others are blessed with talents we lack, things happen out of our control.

Sometimes WAY out of our control—like on May 20, 1975 …

I’ve not had a mother since Gerald Ford was president, the Bee Gees were huge, and Star Wars was only in George Lucas’ mind.

While attending a Tuesday afternoon meeting, Mary Miller, age 51, experienced a blinding headache, slumped on a friend’s sofa, and was rushed to the Ithaca, NY hospital. Two hours later she was gone. An aneurysm took her.

I was eight days shy of turning 17.

It wasn’t fair.

But, I’d certainly never resent my fiftysomething friends today for still having their mom.

That’d be ridiculous!

As ridiculous as begrudging others for having greater success, achievements, possessions, financial status, and good fortune than I do.

Envy doesn’t wear well, and neither does the “It’s not fair! I’m a victim!” mentality that pervades our world today.

When I play victim, I serve nobody—not even myself.

At QBQ, Inc. we recommend asking accountable questions like, “How can I move forward today?” “What can I do to achieve new goals?” and “How can I make a difference?”

Personal Accountability: It’s a better way to live.

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