17 “If Onlys” and How To Chase Them Away

If onlyIf only I was taller I could reach that cupboard above the fridge!

At 5 1/2 feet, “If only I was taller!” could be a frequent lament for me. But since it’s something I can’t change, I can get around this limitation by grabbing a nearby stool or chair.

Bemoaning, griping, and complaining won’t add a single inch to my stature.

Not to mention any joy to my life.

I also used to whine, “If only I was thinner!” Of course, this was something I could change so … I lost weight.

And this:

“If only my mom hadn’t died when I was a teen.”

No fixing that one.

There are three ways to handle an If Only:

1. Find a workaround (the handy stool)

2. Solve it (walk more, eat less)

3. Let. It. Go. (grieve and move on)

Left unattended, any and all If Onlys waste time, talent, and energy.

Agreed?

Yet, they’re so common. Here are 17 If Onlys:

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Humble vs. Haughty—The 5 Truths of Humility

IMG_8188A very fine line exists between humility and haughtiness.

I recently posted this picture of Central Park on our QBQ! Facebook page and wrote this:

Not a bad way to spend a morning, walking Central Park. In Manhattan to teach QBQ! at NBC at “30 Rock” Mon morn.

I knew from experience that posting where I was and why I was there was risky. In 1996, as a young speaker, I was hired to present on the same platform as Lou Holtz, the renowned Notre Dame football coach. Totally excited and enthused, I faxed—yes, faxed—an announcement to my clients.

The next day, a training manager told me that her VP of Sales boss had privately remarked, “There goes Miller grandstanding.”

Ouch.

I suppose I should’ve known better since I’d been taught better …

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Powerful Mentoring: What Mentors Really Do

Mentee John Miller — Mentor Jim Strutton

Mentee John Miller — Mentor Jim Strutton

On a frigid Minnesota January eve, I sat on the edge of the hotel suite couch. Leaning forward, I was working to make a good impression.

It was 1986 and was 27.

When the interview ended, the 6’ 3” sales manager from Atlanta looked down at 5’ 6” me and said, “John, you will make someone a fine sales rep.”

As the door closed behind me, I thought …

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5 Management Mindsets That Kill Training

Learning 2

Allow me to give a “shout out” to some QBQ! training clients. Please bear with me, there’s an important message coming.

Dave Field of Interprint, Inc. in Massachusetts—2005

Debbie Slocum of Husqvarna Construction Products in Missouri—2006

Jeff Clark of Toshiba America Business Solutions in South Dakota—2013

Don Burstow of Burstows Funeral Care in Toowoomba, Queensland, Australia—2015

The dates shown denote when each client began using “Personal Accountability and the QBQ!” training.

I mention these executives because they do what most management folks don’t:

2 CommentsManagement, Personal Accountability

“My boss isn’t perfect! What should I do?”

businessman screaming with flames coming out of his mouth

Last month we published this piece: It’s a NO EXCUSES Moment For Management

Some of you asked, “How should Mandy have handled it?”

Well, here’s what you do when you don’t have the perfect boss.

Our story is about a subordinate/boss or, if you prefer, associate/team leader relationship. If you’re in one of those roles, or ever plan to be, read on …

From Rob, a reader of the QBQ! book:

Leave a commentLeadership, Management, Personal Accountability

Time Management: 6 Reasons To Have Deadlines

Retro Parking meter isolated on white with clipping path

When I was 15, my sister, Lucy, older and wiser by seven years, said something that didn’t make sense to my teen brain:

“If you want something done, give it to a busy person.”

More than forty years later, I recall how that statement confused me—but I get it now.

People with a lot to do already have momentum, vigor, and the systems and tools in place for efficient living. They’re the best candidates for handling a task, solving a problem, or assisting a person, team, or organization in achieving a new goal. 

And, busy people also have …

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It’s a NO EXCUSES Moment For Management

Follow QBQ! on Periscope and Twitter using @QBQGuy

mgrs mirror final

The subject line in the email from Mandy’s manager said “Whereabouts?” and abruptly began with, “Where are you?”

Mandy, a 25-year-old shared employee, works for two organizations. The two entities—each with less than 50 staff—have financial connections and mutual marketplace interests. They collaborated in Mandy’s hiring and split her salary.

She began her employment two months ago—and now’s there’s a problem …

7 CommentsManagement, Personal Accountability

Only People With Careers Can Answer YES! to these 5 Questions


Only People with Careers Can Answer YES! to these 5 Questions

plane

QBQ, career, ownership, career path, love your work

A tall, white-haired fella stopped, smiled, and pointed at the center seat to my left. As I looked up at him—way up—I decided Tall Man was my inverse. I’m 5’ 6” and he had to be 6’ 5”.

Someone else may have offered this gent the roomier seat. However, with a 4-hour flight on the horizon, I decided to maintain ownership of my exit-row, aisle spot. Selfish me.

Tall Man signaled me to stay put and then stepped over me with ease. Moments later, the “Why were you in NYC?” conversation began …

13 CommentsLeadership, Personal Accountability