If you don’t use those little round “blind spot” mirrors on your vehicle’s side mirrors, you should. They work. (see photo)
It struck me as I added them to a new Miller car, that in an instant I did what accountable people do in life:
Removed my blindspot and achieved complete clarity.
As a driver, the little round mirrors enable me to see all things behind me.
Can you imagine doing that with our long-ago youth, where maybe we grew up in “Dysfunction Junction”?
Or how about just seeing last week, yesterday, or an hour ago clearly?
People with clarity know the impact their “family of origin” had on them and have processed it properly. They’re also able to look at a bad month, week, or day—or negative interaction with a colleague, friend, or family member—and learn.
I mean, EVERYTHING we’ve EVER done is part of our past—even the reading of this sentence is now in your past. And since our past is always behind us, the question is, am I learning from my past? That’s what accountable people do.
Sure beats living in the past, eh?
So how do accountable people learn from their past? Do they have little round mirrors attached to their heads?
Not that I’ve noticed.
However, I have noticed they are willing to look into the mirror and ask tough questions like these (in the QBQ! book we call them “QBQs”):
How can I better understand how my past shaped me?
What can I do today to change me?
How am I responsible?
What could I have done differently?
How can I now improve this situation?
What must I do to repair/improve the relationship?
How can I learn from this experience?
Powerful questions, all.
So, I ask again: Got clarity?
Which of the QBQs above will you ask today?