Enabling: Does Compassion Ever Cross the Line?

A phenomenon I’ve noticed: 

People who embrace the QBQ! book’s message of Personal Accountabilityand refuse to engage in victim thinkingsometimes support other folk’s victim-itis. Even though they agree with this: 

When we play the victim, we serve no one—not even ourselves.

Yes, compassion counts. But isn’t it true that to help people get back on their feet to make a better life for themselves and their families, we should help them not play the victim?

Victim thinking and self-pity prevent individuals and groups from progressing, becoming self-sufficient, and succeeding. 

Here are six truths about “Why me?” thinking:

Self-pity …

  1. Destroys joy

  2. Serves no one

  3. Is not productive

  4. Prevents learning

  5. Solves no problems

  6. Does not contribute

Strong belief: It’s flat-out wrong to assist others in choosing self-pity. It’s always good to eliminate victim thinking from our lives while encouraging others to avoid it, as well.

As parents, family members, managers, and friends, let’s each practice accountability and ownership while modeling these powerful principles for those around us. Never forget:

Modeling is the most powerful of all teachers.

Conclusion: The higher path to walk is Personal Accountability—for all of us.

When does compassion become enabling of victim thinking?

(Please do download our 13 Symptoms of Victim Thinking image and keep/share!)

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