QBQ!

Got Shoulder Chips? Rise Above Victim Thinking

I recently heard someone say, “She always seems to have a chip on her shoulder.” Upon hearing that old phrase, I decided to write this piece. Hope it’s not too blunt. 😎

Defining The Chip: Victim Thinking

When a person has a chip on his or her shoulder, that person is essentially holding a grudge, carrying a grievance, and feeling sorry for self. That shoulder chip often leads to belligerence, blame, whining, complaining, anger, and argumentativeness. Not good stuff.

When we have a “chip on the shoulder,” we are simply wallowing in —

Victim Thinking.

Unlike our beautiful balloon rising above the Colorado landscape, well—we’re not rising above.

At the end of this piece, we’ll share 6 steps to rising above victim thinking. Read on!

But here’s the thing about victim thinking:

Humans <almost> never need encouragement to play the victim. We get there quite easily all by ourselves.

Stop Helping People Have Chips

Have you noticed many folks on Facebook, Twitter, and other Social Media platforms seem to go out of their way to encourage others (groups, races, genders, political parties, individuals) to play the victim? I don’t get it.

What Are YOU Hiring?

Hiring. One of the most critical activities organizations and managers engage in—and it never ends.

Come on, be honest—have you ever felt vindicated? I do. 👍🏼

Allow me to share what we wrote in our Outstanding! book even though it was not very “politically correct” when we wrote it. I’m pretty sure some readers thought, Who does this author think he is to eschew securing college and university degrees? Heretic!

We wrote it anyway. 😎

Before we get to the writing, though, see our image above? Straight from a recent LinkedIn news article, it seems some significant employers are coming around to our view. Feels good.

Has your organization come around? Read on to find out!

Seeking and Giving Help — 9/11 or Today

It may not be the time of year we normally think about 9/11—not that we will ever forget—but here’s a story from that awful day I will always remember. Share if you’d like!

John G. Miller, author of these books

Asking a Lousy Question

Hours after the terrorist attacks, I was asking the whiny question, “Why do I have to do everything myself?” Looking back, I was mindlessly rearranging my garage, doing my best to not feel the pain.

I was also avoiding what sat on the back of my pickup truck: a new natural gas-powered furnace/heater for our above-ground pool—which I knew I could never lift off alone. My plan was to levitate it to the ground with sheer mind control.

Not feeling very good about anything, I was suddenly interrupted by a pleasant, “Afternoon, Sir. How ‘ya doing?”

Made My List, Checked It Twice. Your Turn!

It’s the time of year when people focus on what they have. As we all know, some blessings are HUGE and some are … small.

When I challenged myself to consider what I’m thankful for, it occurred to me to use the number of years I’ve been on this Earth.

I am 60.

So here’s my list of 60 people and/or things I’m blessed to have in my life. And, no, they are not in order of priority.

Blessings: What’s On Your List?

My wife, Karen, and I’ve never known anyone whose home burned to the ground.

Until now.

Due to the Camp Fire in northern California last Friday, some family members lost their house in what is now an oxymoron:

Paradise, California. 😥

A brand new house just built in 2017 … gone. Our photo above tells the story.

Personal Accountability Beats Rationalization and Justification

Okay, parents, ‘fess up: Did you take this Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup out of your child’s Halloween bucket? Did you take the big bite out of it and then rationalize and justify your actions with, Little Johnny will never notice! and Sweets have no calories on Halloween!?

Don’t worry, you’re not alone in both candy-ingesting and rationalizing and justifying. Engaging in those behaviors nowadays is a thing. An all-too-common thing.

I know, I’ve done it.

Go 400 Extra Miles To Gain The Extra Edge

Some stories about being outstanding are so outstanding, they speak for themselves. So let’s get right to it! Our story comes from a believer in the QBQ! book and its message of Personal Accountability. Enjoy and pass on!

Accountable Thinking: Choosing Thankfulness Even In Pet Loss

Nug the Pug “owning” Miller grandchild #10 — July 9, 2018

On Tuesday 9/18/18, we buried “Nug the Pug.” She was only 9 years old. Surreal and surprisingly painful, I miss her terribly. In fact, in a text to a daughter who checked on Dad, I responded, “I can’t find Nugget anywhere, but I see her everywhere.” 😥

A week later, in my final Denver Rescue Mission board meeting (my 5-year director stint is up), I shared a message with the group in the photo below. These are wise, Godly, successful people who are committed to helping the homeless of Colorado. They are bankers, CPAs, pastors, executives, and even another professional speaker.

Be Like Edgar: CHOOSE To Be Outstanding!

As we write in the Outstanding! book, employers must begin to “hire character over credentials.” Organizations would do well to focus less on college degrees and more on candidates with strong character.

Edgar has character.

We get our vehicles serviced at our local Les Schwab Tire Center. Schwab is conveniently located only two miles from our home but the main reason we always go to Schwab?

Edgar.

Edgar, age 22, is a shining example of what a young person can do and become. Yes, the entire Les Schwab staff is courteous and helpful, and store manager, Jeremiah, gets credit for that. However, Edgar stands out.

Which makes him … outstanding.

Evidence of Character

Edgar’s character exudes from him at every turn. What’s so exceptional about this Edgar fella?

6 Truths of Self-Pity and the Dangers of Victim Thinking

When does compassion for people become the enabling of victim thinking?

Here’s a phenomenon I’ve noticed: Some people who love the QBQ! book’s message of Personal Accountability—and refuse to suffer from victim thinking themselves—will support other people’s tendency to play the victim. Even though they agree with this statement:

When I play the victim, I serve no one—not even myself.

Why some go out of their way to paint certain groups of people as victims—seeking to create a “fairer and more just world,” they’d say—is beyond me. PLEASE don’t get me wrong, we should desire to serve those who are less fortunate, but …