Who ‘ya gonna call? Blame Busters!
We’ve been working to bust blame at QBQ, Inc. for a long time. Given the human propensity to point fingers and our mission of Making personal accountability a core value for people and organizations, I’m certain we’ll never run out of clients.‘Ya think? 😆
Of course, this whole blame-busting thing begins with me. If you’re a reader of the QBQ! book, then you understand.
Three key points:
- To blame is to be human.
- Blame is a costly endeavor.
- The Blame Game can be eliminated.
However, to achieve Point 3, we must know why we blame. To grasp what drives our need to externalize, look outside of ourselves for answers, and believe our problems are not our problems to solve.
We recently asked our QBQ! Facebook Group (join us!) this question:
Fundamentally, what causes humans to make excuses/blame?
The group members did so well, we gave their performance an “A” grade. 😉
Here is the unedited list of reasons why people blame, straight from a bunch of super-sharp human beings!
- Jodie: It’s the least difficult path to take
- John: We’re insecure
- Cliff: Blaming is quick and easy
- Alphretta: We don’t want to admit our flaws
- Janice: Taking accountability requires work
- Tracy: We possess a victim mindset
- Eric: Blaming gives us a feeling of justification
- Krissi: People who blame are fearful
- Leslie: We feel shame so we deflect
- Kara: We can’t possibly be the problem
- David: Finding the root of a problem is hard
- Luis: It feels good
- Jen: Blame is a form of self-preservation
- Nelda: Easier to see other people’s faults
- Deb: If I blame, I don’t have to change
- William: Ego
- James: Puts the attention on other people
- Brett: We want to look good
- Diane: We need to be “right”
- Deborah: It’s comfortable
- Brooke: We blame because we’ve been blamed
- Diane: To avoid consequences
- Greg: Lack of humility
- Carrie: We need a reason for our pain
- Kelly: We simply can’t be in the wrong
Okay, now we know the many deep-seated, psychological drivers behind our human propensity to point fingers, make excuses, and blame.
Which ones resonate with you? Are you willing to identify those you struggle with? Can you add any to our list? Thanks for pondering!
We blame to deflect.
We blame to exalt ourselves.
We blame so we are not blamed.
We blame to appear better than we are.
We all blame because we are all sinners.
It’s fear of failure and rejection. We still don’t believe that it’s okay to learn from our mistakes so we “can’t “ make any. (Therefore it clearly is the other guys fault.) We have also forgotten how to be gracious with each other, so we worry if I messed up you May think poorly of me or worse walk away.