Accountability and American Role Models

Grab the new QBQ! Workbook here. Personal, powerful, practical!

Note: I did not write this piece from a political view, so let’s not go there. This blog is about responsibility, integrity, leadership, and great parenting. Enjoy!

Politicians Aren’t Our Role Models

“What do we tell the children?” is a question some have asked since the U.S. presidential election. It’s a question that takes me back 18 years.

In 1998, the wall-to-wall news was about President Bill Clinton and a 22-year-old intern named Monica and their Oval Office activities. It was the story, day in, day out. The Miller children werole models-america-parenting-QBQ-personal-accountabilityre 15, 13, 10, and 8 years old.

Impressionable ages, would you agree?

But what I can tell you from the heart is this: The Clinton affair didn’t cause my wife, Karen, and me to wonder what we might tell the kids. Not even for a moment.

Because we’re perfect parents? No. Because of our political party association? No. Because we don’t follow what’s going on in the world or have opinions? Nope!

We didn’t think about it because we’d already come to a parental conclusion, possibly subconsciously since we don’t recall discussing it. Here it is:

Formula for Powerful Personal Growth: 2 – 1 = 3

Pruning: “to remove unneeded branches or limbs; to trim; to clear the undesirable”

Tree collage with nbrs

It might be the most common metaphor of all time, but it works. In the collage above:

Image One: Our upside down Mulberry tree, appearing dead.

Image Two: Two days after intense pruning.

Image Three: One month later, we have the healthiest Mulberry tree evah!

Pruning trees works. It also works for peopleif we let it.

So often, though, the “undesirable” in us doesn’t get trimmed away because when someone tells us, “You really need to change!” we respond with … 

Personal Accountability: Growing Up In Dysfunction Junction

age of accountability1973:  At 15, future @QBQGuy – Johnny “the mascot” – doing his job making sister, Lucy, and bro-in-law, Tom, laugh.

There are parallel, if not competing, truths existing in my life:

The alcoholic home I grew up in shaped me in every way.

I am accountable for all of my thoughts, emotions, words, actions, and results.

Recently, on our Raising Accountable Kids Facebook page, a follower posted this question:

Ever Overreact With Your Teenager?

Reactions2

This email came to us just the other day. Enjoy!

Dear QBQ, Inc.—

My manager just took our department through the “Personal Accountability and the QBQ!” training, and I wanted to say thank you! Personal accountability is something I try to integrate into my daily living, but sometimes fail at it.

The QBQ! training came at a perfect time. Not only has it given me a tool to use at work, but at home as a mom.

As most parents know, communication with a teenager is a very challenging mountain to climb—and I was not sure I would ever “reach the top.”

While sitting in the QBQ! session, I received this text from our 17-year-old:

“Mom, there’s no way I can get to the school by 3:15 today to get Johnny.”

My initial reaction was essentially this:

13 “Holiday Traditions” to Lose – NOW!

Beyond some super bad holiday portraits taken in some families (we’ve all seen them!, there are some other holiday traditions that we might want to lose. Read on … enjoy and share!

Whether we plan to travel or not for the holidays, it’s likely we’ll have luggage. Yes, luggage in the form of the baggage of old habits—ones that reduce the quality of this wonderful season.

Are any of the following 13 holiday traditions—or “baggage”—familiar to you?

JUST99WORDS: “I learned a lot!” You sure?

I love those conflicting two-word phrases called oxymorons … “pretty ugly” “legal brief” “old news” “committee decision” And, “country music.” 🙂 Another: Adult learning We’re not good at learning because we’ve “mis-learned” what learning is. Learning is not about showing up. Learning is not about going to class, memorizing content, passing a test. That’s called…

Skip the Blame, Solve the Problem

 Blame

“Karen, I dropped Becca!”

It was our son-in-law calling my wife’s cell.

It seems that “Becca Boo”—her painful but triumphant Sept 21, 2012 birth story here—had hit her head at the Denver airport where we had just dropped the Lindeen family for an evening flight home to Wisconsin. As fathers have for a millennium, Erik had been tossing Rebecca up in the air while she giggled and grinned—till she slipped through his hands.

THUD.